In this edition of The Gift, we’ve got Valentine’s Day gifting advice for people who hate Valentine’s Day. Plus: a really cool candle holder and the best gifts for the family do-er.
Valentine’s Day gets a bad rap—understandably so.
It can inspire sappy cringe, bad chocolate, and lame design. For singles, it can be an annoying turn of the knife, inescapable even when they’re just grabbing Band-Aids at CVS. And, for those in relationships, the timing couldn’t be worse. Just when recovery from that painful Christmas credit card bill is in sight comes another wallet-emptying obligation.
Then, there’s dining out. I covered restaurants for a long time, and it’s a given that Valentine’s Day is rife with poor-value prix fixes and harried servers and cooks dealing with hordes of often entitled diners who tend to tip poorly. That’s no mood for love.
If you—like me—find the wide swath of Valentine’s Day expectations to be a bit absurd, I have a bunch of tried-and-true moves for avoiding annoying pitfalls, getting better-value gifts, and making the night actually fun. Here, my friends, is the Valentine’s Day survival guide for skeptics, side-eyers, and, yes, haters.
Your love can be Platonic love
The true origins of Valentine’s Day are debatable, and so too is the definition of the highest form of love. (Plato, in fact, argued that the kind between souls ranked over the carnal sort.) So why not conjure up your own definition? It doesn’t have to be Galentine’s Day proper. Celebrate your fave gal pal’s beautiful soul with an adorable little pear vase or artsy reboot-your-life cards. Practice self-love with this pearl apple bracelet. Buy your bromance bud this elegant rye whiskey (that made pioneering bartender Audrey Saunders’ “eyes roll back” the first time she tasted it) or, if he’s into NA drinks, one of these suave wine alternatives.
It’s really for the kids
When I was growing up, my mom bought me a heart-shaped Linzer cookie every year and, later on, new undies. By the time I reached a dating age, the holiday had been hardwired into my brain circuitry as one of unconditional parental love, rather than the fickle romantic kind.
If you want to future-proof your kiddo against the bitterness of any single V-Days ahead, make a small, unwavering tradition with them, too. Maybe yours will be a box of See’s candies, colorful bath bombs, or making heart-shaped pancakes together for dinner—a sweet touchstone they’ll look forward to every year.
Valentine’s Day is a stay-in night
If you’re in a relationship, skip dinner out on February 14. I say it’s better to spend your budget on luxuries that will make a simple homecooked meal extravagant, like truffles shaved over buttered noodles or caviar atop Spanish chips—anything leftover will make scrambled eggs the next morning even sexier. Or you could learn to shuck oysters together with a pair of these knives. (Oysters Rockefeller is both easy and decadent.) For the truly lazy, my go-to is ordering pizza and blowing it out on an extra-fancy bottle of wine—red or white, whatever your preference. (Maybe with this sleek Dansk candle holder and these lithe candles to get a vibe going?) Whatever your move, you can cherish something special together—without the stress of overbooked reservations or a V-Day upcharge.
Spending big in February is silly
Unless you’re in a new relationship, you’ve likely already spoiled your person recently on their birthday, your anniversary, and the holidays—less than two months ago! I say there’s no need for grand gestures in February. This is the time for small tokens of appreciation, be they goofy, tender, or just fun. When I got my boyfriend Mike’s Hot Honey as a gag gift one year, it turned into his must-have for pepperoni pizza. Upscale Swedish gummies, handsome Pendleton socks, and this rose-quartz heart are all delightfully sweet options.
The most appreciated V-Day gift is free
You know what I mean.
But if you really want to go all out, my advice is to clean the house (that’ll set the mood better than any music), start a bath or break out that dormant lingerie, and toss in a massage bar or a chic new lube. Whatever adventure you choose, the night is your oyster—and, by the way, have you considered shucking them?
