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People spend their lives looking for love. Some are successful, while others never get lucky. However, one thing is certain: love crosses all boundaries and is shared by every living thing, including monsters! This is the strange setting for Kaichu: The Kaiju Dating Sim. This unusually weird game will confuse and disturb you throughout.
Developed by Squiddershins and published by Top Hat Studios, Inc, this is a monster dating simulation title. Yes, you read that correctly. It’s a game about monsters that date. Yet, it ups the weird ante by incorporating a Cilla Black-style Blind Date mechanic. So, not only must you try to find monster love, but you must prove your compatibility with your gargantuan partner. Honestly, even writing this review makes me feel uneasy and confused!
Kaichu: The Kaiju Dating Sim made me speechless.
I’ve played some strange games in my time, but Kaichu: The Kaiju Dating Sim certainly hits the top 3. There isn’t one moment that didn’t leave me feeling aghast, and I was mostly left speechless. Such is the stupidity of its plot and core concept, that it is tough to succinctly describe what I experienced. Effectively, you control a gigachu, a giant romantic monster who is desperate to find love. He opens the game by finding a partner he wishes to woo, and then the madness ensues.
The action takes place on a top-down and simplified map of the Earth. You’ll observe a handful of monsters hanging around famous landmarks. Accordingly, you’ll interact with the one you wish to mate with, and the game begins. From here, you’ll have dates at poignant places around the globe. Whether it is the Great Wall of China, Big Ben, Chichen Itza, or more, you are free to choose. Whichever you decide matters not, as it bears little impact on the gameplay loop. Consequently, this makes the gameplay a bit weirder still.
It’s question time.
The core mechanics of Kaichu: The Kaiju Dating Sim revolves around getting to know your date. Once you’ve chosen your romantic location, you’ll be asked a range of questions to see how compatible you are with each other. For every question asked, there are 3 answers to give. Each one is graded as positive, neutral, and negative. If you respond correctly, the monsters hit it off, and for unknown reasons, they start to destroy the famous landmark. If the date is successful, the landmark is destroyed and the beasts kiss. This loop repeats itself across 3 acts and if you are lucky, they are romantically compatible and you unlock the happy ending. If not, it is game over and you simply start again.
Now, on paper, this doesn’t sound that bad. Yes, it’s a little strange, but that’s not a terrible thing. However, what is particularly odd is the lack of guidance you are given. The questions are never explained and there is little to no logical thought process behind any of them. Subsequently, you guess your way through the opening act as I had no idea what turned on a giant monstrous flying plant. Luckily, though, as the game wears on, you grasp some idea of each of the beasts’ personalities and this makes things easier. Yet, until that happens, it is just ridiculous to play.
Kaichu: The Kaiju Dating Sim is vivid and nice to look at.
For all my complaints, I can’t say anything bad about the graphics. Kaichu: The Kaiju Dating Sim has a wonderful Manga/Anime style that is clean and vivid. Consequently, it is fantastic to look at. Furthermore, I adored the bizarre nature of the cutscenes and the simplified animation. What’s more, each famous landmark was easily identifiable, and I liked the clichéd environments of each country.
The audio, however, was a bit of a mixed bag. I loved the music as it added energy and a jovial atmosphere. Moreover, the sound effects of destruction were equally enjoyable. But, the cutscenes between the dates were unbearable. The news anchors that were reporting the situation were annoying, repetitive, and unnecessary. Accordingly, the developers should have either made them silent, or they should have acted out every line. As it is, it was super annoying and was the worst element of a very unusual title.
Simple gameplay = basic controls.
When a game is as straightforward as Kaichu: The Kaiju Dating Sim, you can expect basic controls. Consequently, with an excellent UI, and easy-to-select answers, you couldn’t go wrong. Even though the story was bat shit crazy, it was easy to play and simple to pick up.
If you enjoy the insanely weird plot, and the concept of monsters hooking up, you’ll love Kaichu: The Kaiju Dating Sim. As such, you’ll be glad to know there is plenty of longevity and replay value. However, if, like me, you don’t get it, you’ll find the idea to be a bit too unusual, and quite repetitive. Accordingly, this is one title that is divisive and aimed at a niche audience.
Kaichu: The Kaiju Dating Sim wasn’t for me.
Game developers can’t please everyone. Yet, when a game is as unusual as Kaichu: The Kaiju Dating Sim, they certainly don’t help themselves. I can appreciate that some gamers will adore this, but I’m certainly not one of those people. As such, I won’t recommend you buy it. However, more information can be found here! Will you help each monster find love? Answer the questions, smash up the landmarks, and find your happy ever after.
